touchdown jesus: my love of football's place in life

Make no mistake about it: I love college football.  More than that, I love Arkansas Razorback football.  (yes I did say, and mean, "love", as in "having deep affection for")

Besides growing up being indoctrinated to love no other sports team other than ones from the University of Arkansas by way of an entire family system that ran on the highs and lows of seasons in the Fall, it is hard to say why I love Arkansas football so much.  The Hogs have never actually done anything for me, outside of giving me emotional highs and lows throughout the years along with great memories of times shared with friends in and around games.  On the contrary, they have actually given me plenty of reason to not follow them so intensely.  I have lived through more heartbreaking games and seasons than not, yet like the main character in a bad Lifetime movie, I find myself returning to my emotionally abusive love time and time again.

With no tangible reason, I simply love Arkansas football....perhaps too much.

Yet, even with this strong, unrelenting love for the team, I do not find my identity in being a Razorback fan.  There are plenty of people that identify me with the team, as being a fan, much like I am identified as being a rabid Jack Johnson fan.  While I am ok with this, and see no problem socially or even theologically with people being able to identify you with something you enjoy, it remains to not be who I am.

I find my identity in Christ...alone.

Unlike the Hogs, who have nothing for me, Jesus has done everything for me.  My team constantly practices, trains, and plays as if I were nonexistent.  They have done this for years and will continue to do so.  I could go up to any of the players and not be known in the slightest by any of them.  This is not, however, the same case for Christ.  He has, and continues to do, everything with me in mind.  If it wasn't enough that He gave His own life as payment for all that I've done that falls short of God's glory, He continues to seek me out with His unchanging and unconditional love day after day, loving me as if I were the only one in existence.  Now that's something to get excited about.

While I do reserve much of what little emotional energy I have to go towards football in the Fall, that is not because I love Jesus any less or place football any higher.  For me, it is simply because I place only a fraction of my spiritual life within the confines of emotion.  I see God speak to and through me in many different ways that are not emotional.  I often find emotions to be tricky and a bit deceiving, not to mention I don't emote much in general.  That is not to say that those that find emotional release and comfort in their relationship with God are less "together".  That's just my style.

So, as I find myself reluctantly coming to the latter part of another college football season, I do have a distaste for the drought of entertainment in my life that I enjoy living vicariously through my team but know that at this time of year, as with every time of year, I look to Christ as my strength, guide, power, and fulfillment.  Football teams come and go, players have good days and bad, things of this world (even football teams) ultimately disappoint.  But, it is the love that God continues to so graciously shower me with, despite my best efforts falling short of being worthy of Him, that sustains me.

I truly believe there will be football in heaven.  There has to be...its just so good!


btw: sorry for the Jesus-juke


-peace

mama never mentioned there being days like this

Throughout Christendom singles are taught to conduct themselves in a certain manner that, if done correctly, will allow them the joys of relationship bliss that God not only condones but also blesses.  Interestingly this advice is often given by people that are married and no longer relate to the struggles and pitfalls of navigating the world of “finding someone” and is often taught as if the audience has never heard any idea on how to date someone.

While there is no set formula that guarantees success, there are plenty of rules that are looked upon as the gold standard by which someone is to find a mate.  Often these rules are good ones such as “seek God first and someone will come along that falls into place with your Godly desires”, “search for character over physical attributes”, or “be modest, pure, and above reproach”.  These rules are, in fact, good ones to live and conduct oneself by, but what happens when they don’t’ “work”?

I’ve read the books, listened to the sermons, sought Godly council-the whole 9 yards- in efforts to prepare myself to be the man God would have meet, date, and ultimately marry the woman God has for me.  I’ve followed the rules and guidelines set forth by scripture in many cases to the T.  Yet, at the end of the day, and subsequently end of every relationship, I find myself alone wondering what went wrong.  There is always the classic “it’s not you, its me” routine that I get, but it just feels like that doesn’t suffice.  In most of the relationships I’ve been in I’ve done what was required of me by the book and come away empty handed.

Here is how my typical relationship goes:

Meet a girl I find attractive

Talk to her to get to know her

Ask her out

Go on a few dates

Meet her friends and maybe family

Steer clear of physical contact that would lead to sin

Keep a very open line of communication about my intensions and where the relationship is going

Pray regularly about doing the right thing in all aspects of the relationship

Seek advice from friends and Godly council

Go on a few more dates

Get dumped

So what do we do with the idea of a relationship not working even when we do all the right things?

To be honest, I don’t know.

The easy answer, that isn’t so easy to accept, is to trust God in His timing and ultimate plan.  We do not have infinite knowledge and intellect…He does.  He knows what’s best for us in everything, even relationships.

At times I wish I had done something wrong in relationships so I could look at the situation and say “this is what I need to fix”, fix it, and be ready to go into a relationship with everything worked out.  That’s not how these things work though.  Sometimes it just isn’t right.  The timing may be bad, the other person may not be ready for a relationship, or God is trying to teach you something else entirely.

There are those moments of doubt and being nothing but perplexed by the situation of things not working out, but that does not mean God has given up on the whole thing.  Perhaps the best practical way we can go about it is continuing to do what is right in God’s sight and know that He will reward the effort some day in one way or another.

So for those fellow warriors still in the confusing battle that is “lack there of”…hold on!

It is always too early to quit.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Please note that this, in no way, is a knock on anyone that subscribes to a certain idea, book, or philosophy on dating.  Nor is this a dig at anyone of the girls that have dumped me along the way.  Instead, it is just me attempting to shed some light on what I see as a frustrating aspect of the life of a single person in a Christian context.

peace.

God speaking to me...this time about relationships

God can speak to us in so many ways.  That alone is impressive.  It is even more impressive that God speaks to us in ways that hone in with our personalities.  Lately gone has been speaking to me through means of my intellect more so than through experiences.  A perfect example of this is how much I feel I've learned recently about relationships and the actions God calls me to in those regards, and I'm not even in a relationship.

Over the course of the past several weeks I have had great Godly conversations with several people about their relationships, models of Godly relationships, or what Scripture says about the subject.  These conversations have been ones that truly speak to me despite that fact that I cannot fully relate to every aspect of them because of my standing in the world of "relationships".  In addition to that, I've had one particular old friend that has been posting up a storm on facebook about her single friends needing to contact her to find a mate. While it's been comical at times, she has also taken to blogging about the topic and how she sees many of the struggles and factors that come into play in the dating world.  It is a great read and a source that I think highly of-she's been married for a few years now and has 3 kids with her wonderful husband.

Then, a BCM director friend posted a link to a church's site where they have the audio from a sermon series about relationships and marriage.  It's good stuff. 

Bouncing off of that, I read through 1 Timothy 6:11-12 and was very encouraged and challenged to prepare myself to step up more as a man.  And when I say "prepare myself to step up more as a man" I mean in every aspect of life: relationships, my witness and testimony of Christ's continual work in my life, ministry, finances, and thought.  God does not call me, as a man, to an easy and sidelined existence.  The creator of the universe made me in such a way that I would take hold of every opportunity before me to bring glory to His name in a mighty way.  That goes for how I pursue and treat a women to how I make the most of every opportunity to serve those around me as Christ served.

I also think about how fortunate I have been in my life to be surrounded by great men of God that have given a great example of how to lead, serve, and minister without sacrificing manhood in any way.  I look at men like my hometown pastor Johnny Hutchison, my college roommate and bff Ben Neiser, and my buddy Jace Tubbs who have all modeled how to be a man in service to everyone around them, especially their wives.  I hope to be able to live a servant manhood as they have in all aspects of my life, including marriage.  But, I'm not there yet, so for now I listen and prepare.


-peace

women... part 1 of many i'm sure

As I get older and remain single I learn more about myself, what I want in a relationship, and what God wants for me in both areas along the way.

In many ways I feel I've thrown off the desires to hastily get into any relationship that presents itself just because I long to be in one, but also look for the opportunity to be a man, step up to the plate, and make something happen when it is presented.  This is a fine line that I find very difficult to navigate (making and letting things happen).

One realization I have come to throughout my journeys in knowing and pursuing women is the fact that my "list" of "needs" (that being things and qualities a woman must have for me to consider her a viable option) gets shorter and shorter over time.  When I was in college my list consisted of things so specific, I would have only been able to date a female version of myself.  No one could live up to the criteria.  As of late, while my list has not gotten down to just one or two simple, and of course Godly, things, it is much more manageable.

Ultimately I would love to have someone to come along side of me in every aspect of life; ministry, social outings, random life adventures, and the like whom stands for the same things I do (making Christ's name known, loving others, and enjoying time on this green planet while we have it).  I find all the minor details I used to get worked up over insignificant.  Do I still long deep within me to marry a woman that loves college football as much as me? Yes, of course.  Is that the, or even a, determining factor that makes or breaks a girl for me? No...not any more (it used to be).

I may never find a girl that loves all the same music that I do, shares my affection for all things bacon, or even knows how football "works".

As it says in Proverbs 31:1a
"A wife of noble character, who can find?"

Well I sure haven't found her, but I sure as heck am looking.

In the end God has a plan for my future in this area of life we call "love" and even though it may not look as storybook as I'd like it to, I'm fine with that because He knows these things a lot better than I do. He did create the whole thing after all.


-peace

is my all not enough?

I'm not one of those that has a dramatic testimony as to how Christ came in and dramatically rearranged my life.  I was not turned from a life of killing people, selling and doing drugs, selling my body for money, ripping poor people off, or the like.  Instead, I was ten years old when I became a Christ follower.  I did so not because my life was so much in shambles that He was the only place I could turn for relief.  Instead, I turned to Him because I realized, the best a ten-year-old's understanding manage, that I was a sinner that could do nothing to earn Heaven on my own.

After that point though, I continued to stay on my path of being a "good kid".  To this day, I have never done drugs, consumed alcohol (outside of Nyquil), had sex, or killed anyone.  Yet, even with my list of "I haven'ts" I remain unworthy of His mercy.  I have sacrificed many things, including relationships, countless physical pleasures, material possessions, and a career that would pay decent, all for Him.  With this, it would seem that I'd have a right to proclaim that I have earned some sort of extra favor with God.  I'm a minister for goodness sake after all.  Yet, even with all that I have done it remains a feeble effort at best compared to God's perfection.

"We all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment."
                                                                                                                                   Isaiah 64:6

We, as humans, have a condition of sin that makes living up to God's standard impossible on our own merit.  We are not sinners because we sin, we are sin because we are sinners.  While this is bad news at first glance, a closer look reveals something marvelous: while we are sinners by birth and condition and we continue to offer nothing but filthy rags at the feet of God on our best days of being righteous, because He is so Holy and Good, His Grace and Mercy abound so much that He is able to sustain us and do His work through us.  That is good news my friends.

So, even though I fail miserably and often and on my best day of doing good I still am not able to earn any good things from God, He continues to shower me with blessings and strength...because HE LOVES ME. (and you just as much)

Selah that



-peace

open minded

I was having a discussion via someone's facebook post the other day and something came to mind that I fins to be a growing trend in society.  There are a lot of people that claim to be very "open minded" but remain some of the most close minded people I know of.

Here's what I mean:
The discussion started as a talk about Texas' super conservative school boards forcing certain teachings down students' throats, which I'm against, but then turned toward science versus religion in a way.  I'll be the first to admit that science and any argument against it is not my speciality or something I'm all that interested in to be honest.  Yet, I kept find myself going back to this conversation because something stuck out to me in this individual that I see a lot in other areas of life.  Many people claim to have an open minded perspective but are, in fact, closed off from thought outside of what they're comfortable with.

Take politics for example.
(Again, this is not my area of expertise and I often care very little for it other than voting in an informed manner - there is too much drama that me arguing about is not going to change)
Often I see "liberals" talk about how "conservatives" are close minded about minorities, the poor, the environment, and spending.  In reality though, many times these are sweeping generalities and uninformed at that.  I see many "liberals" not open to the idea of more than one solution to problems or ways of learning.  The same could be said about "conservatives" thinking "liberals" are closed off to the ideas of religion and its place in government and schools, when, in reality, there are far more options than they consider or discuss.

At any rate, I feel that we've gotten to a place as society where any idea that isn't yours is shot down immediately as being close minded.  That, in and of itself, is the actual definition of being close minded.  It's really a shame that things are this way in government, public policy, and even within friendships.
We should all strive to have a truly open mind for whatever or whomever comes before us.

A couple things to keep in mind:
I do believe in absolute truth and don't budge on it, as prescribed by Scripture, so don't think I'm some "let's all get along and accept everything and everyone's ideas".  I know some of you have already judged me as such.  Don't do it.  You're being close minded.

Christians: Truth fears no question.  Just because you allow yourself to consider outside possibilities to questions you have or hear does not mean God is scared or changed.  He is truth and He is right.  Fear not.  An open mind is not the Devil's work.  If anything, it is God revealing himself to be what He is.


-peace

unique generation

I was born in a time unlike any other in history.
You might ask yourself, "What was so special about the fall of 1983?"

This was a time when Reaganomics was just getting started, Michael Jackson was becoming a solo pop star, and the internet was  still something that "the government had created" in comic books.  The times have changed, as happens often.  Yet, not since perhaps WWI when soldiers saw planes in combat has a generation seen such a dramatic change that would alter the future so drastically.

Before you write me off as the typical "back in my day" sorta thing, let me explain more in-depth.

Before those born circa '83 people grew up on typewriters and were introduced to the computer keyboard in adulthood for example.  Same goes for many things that are commonplace now for children to grow up on such major advances while their parents were introduced to them in adulthood: the internet, cellphones, CD's, mp3's, and the list goes on.

I remember very distinctly being labeled as "guinea pigs" by a teacher for a brand new idea being implemented into the junior high curriculum; "computer class".  It was a class made up of a room full of computers (each monitor taking up the area of a desk) with black screens where we'd type simple functions in yellowish type.  Two years later I was a part of the last class to take keyboarding class on these computers.  The following year, we had screens with color and (limited) access to the world wide web.  Growing up we could buy records on vinyl (not because it was cool or ironic, but because it was the only way to buy an album) until cassettes came out and then replaced by CD's ultimately.  The security device back then was putting tapes in a plastic holster at least 6 times the size of the cassette.

It is not the amount of things that changed or what they were (as long as there are vintage collectors, there will be vinyl and CD's around in someone's collection of antiques), instead it is the manner in which things changed and never looked back.  If you look back upon other times when things happened, they tend to be more slowly progressed and don't alter the future in such a dynamic way.
The rate at which online life (relationships, commerce, and news) is growing and will continue to grow, you can't help but see the dramatic and world-altertering change that I've been able to see in my short lifetime already.

It will be fun to blabber on, when I'm old, about how "back in my day" we didn't have this or that.  When a gallon of gas was under a dollar, when you went to the store to buy everything, when people knew what a floppy disk was, and when the internet was new.
It's very fun to be in the segment of the population stuck between Generation X, with their angst and over-reaction to their parents' causes and Generation Y, with their vast knowledge of technology and spoiled childhoods in which discipline was absent.
Is it frustrating being such a unique population? At time, yes.  Sometimes I feel that I don't relate to the true Gen Xer's because I'm too young, but definitely don't relate to the Gen Yer's because they like terrible music and don't appreciate a time when MTV played music.  But, what a unique opportunity to be on the cusp of the front end of monumental times that have been, and will be, like no other.


-peace

hero

Growing up male offers many luxuries when it comes to heroes.

I can remember plenty of adventures in the backyard, on the school playground, and as I rode my bike through the streets of our neighborhood imagining I was one of the several heroes I looked up to.  Whether it was wanting to have all the gadgets and cool car like Batman, the claws and healing powers of Wolverine, or super strength like my dad seemed to have.  If it made me run faster, jump higher, and somehow get the girl-I wanted it.

This love of the hero never decreased as I grew up.  You would imagine that once a man reached a certain age, the time of longing to have infinite strength, fly around from place to place, or have a cave full of gadgets would dissipate.  To the contrary, this longing does the opposite-it intensifies.  The desire to be the hero only transforms over time.  Instead of wanting to be a the character seen in the latest comic book, men turn to characters in history-based movies. (I use the term "history-based" loosely) Men like Leonidas, the Spartan king, Jeremiah Johnson, the manly outdoorsman, or almost everyone's favorite William Wallace, the warrior poet who helped free Scotland.

All these men and characters ignite in us a desire to be and do something greater than ourselves.  It is something that is near to the heart of every man.  Yet, as I think of all these characters, all of whom I'd still love to emulate in some way, I can't help but think that my longing are off as to who to be like.  As I think of Jesus, as a man, I can't help but think; "What better hero to strive to be like?".

We often have this misconception that Jesus was this meager and frail man that never raised His voice above a whisper and wouldn't be caught dead making the most of life.  Instead, we see a man that was in amongst the people of His day where he ate, drank, partied, and loved them where they were.  He addressed need, sought justice, loved, and even raised His voice, and a little cain with it.  Heck, I'd be willing to bet, if He had bothered He could have gotten the girl. (keep in mind He was not married, nor did He father children or bother with any of that despite what Tom Hanks says in any movie where he has creepy sort-long hair)  He exemplifies all the characteristics of what a man should be.  He was a dynamic leader, He gave of Himself sacrificially in all He did, and acted out of nothing but love and glory for God.


In the end, that's the hero I want to be like.
Chances are I'll never lead an army to victory in a great battle that will be remembered throughout history, I may not give an inspirational speech that will inspire generations after me, I may not get the girl, and, despite my dreams at night, I may never get the chance to lead the resistance against the zombie and/or machine apocalypse.  Despite this, my ultimate desire is to be the ultimate man and hero in living as Christ lived.  Because when it all is said and done, what better path to follow than that of the man that saved the day, once and for all.




-peace

the reason i don't support gay marriage

As a Christ-follower I am called to love everyone.

Because of this, I try to love everyone.
I'd say I try to love everyone equally, but that's not entirely true.  Because many people are jerks and have opinions that are in complete opposition to mine I have to try to love them more.  It is very easy to love those that are easily loveable, but not those that I don't like.  That's tough.

With that being said, I try to love all gay people.  Again, I say try because some of them are jerks and some aren't.  The reason I aim to love them is because Christ loves them and desperately longs to be in a relationship with them.  Some would say this is wrong because they are in complete opposition to Him in their deliberate sin.  Yet, if this were true, we'd all be screwed because we are all unloveable with that criteria. 

Instead, Jesus loves us despite our sin (which we all have enough of even if it's not things we consider "major").  The fact of the matter is any sin, yes just one, warrants seperation from God.  It doesn't matter if that sin is acceptable to the current government, society as a whole, or your grandma.  If it falls short of God's perfection, it seperates you from Him.  So, being gay is no different than lying to your boss about what time you got in this morning when you were running late.

In the case of gay marriage I have one major beef.  While I love my country and feel I've been called to obey its laws (within the bounds of not going against God's will to glorify Him) I can't support a cause and idea that promotes going in direct contradiction to God's righteousness.  God sees homosexuality as a sin, thus I cannot support it as a lifestyle or law. 

Let me be very clear though.  I also don't support any law that allows the wealthy to abuse power and take from the poor.  I don't support any law or idea that promotes children not being fed well or one that promotes heterosexual sin (such as prostotution, etc).  My beef isn't with gay marriage because it involves homosexuals.  My beef is with the support of something that goes against God.

While I won't support any law or idea that promotes sin, I do aim to love those that are in the sin that the law or idea promotes.
I love gay people.
I love gay people and want them to come to Christ and live abundandly in Him as much as I want the banker who's job it is to cheat people out of money every day.  I love gay people as much as I love the government official who takes advantage of his status for his personal gain.  I love gay people as much as I love the guy that looks me straight in the face and lies to me about something petty.  I love gay people as much as I love my own mother (and I do love her-see this post).  In all these cases I am called to love people that are sinners, who have fallen short of God's perfection.  They each need Christ's forgiveness, I am called to aid in them better realizing that.

Does it irritate me that this particular issue is based on a group that maintains their identity based on their sin? Yes.  But this is no excuse to love them any less.  We do not have to love what any sinner does in their sinnfulness.  Instead, we should strive to love everyone as Christ loved us because while we were still sinners He died for us.  He didn't wait until we were squeeky clean and had everything figured out.  He came down and grab us in the midst of our mess and filth and loved us anyway.

When it comes down to it, this is not a civil rights issue or one about justice for everyone.  Instead, it is a much deeper moral issue that points to us as a nation and people pointed down a path that continues to open the door to more and more loose judgement in light of God's Word.  While I don't think that we should be a nation that forces Christian beliefs on everyone, I do know, as history has shown, that nations and people that consciously live in opposition to God don't fair too well.  I don't want to see that in my generation or future generations.  This is something that goes above and beyond simply being a civil rights or government issue.  Instead it is an issue of how history and ultimately God will look upon us in light of God's standards.
Again, I love gay people (at least try to) but cannot support anything that opposes God's Word and will.



-peace

dad

While I'm not an emotional person or let things get the best of me, I find Father's Day to be less than appealing since my dad died in the fall of 2007.

It had been a long, up-hill battle with a failing body.  It was a battle that not only ultimately claimed his life, but many aspects of his personality and ability to have the vigor for life he once possessed.

It is amazing how I had forgotten how fun he was until after he was gone.  For years he had become so weak and merely a shell of himself physically, emotionally, and mentally.  This change was dramatic enough that I often felt like I didn't know the man he had become.  I resented his uneven keel, even though it was due to the plethora of medication he was on.  Not to mention the sheer amount of physical turmoil he endured at the hand of his kidneys failing him.  Upon his passing, as I gathered pictures, videos, and trinkets from a life stolen by disease, I was able to realize and remember the man for what he was, and not what he had become.

My dad was my football coach. and my basketball coach. and my baseball coach.  He was the man that taught me to call the Hogs and ride a bike.  He was the dad all the other kids were jealous of for one reason or another, whether it was trying to catch air in his old pickup truck on the way home from practice or letting us sneak cookies when mom wasn't looking.  His knees were what I held on to as a toddler watching Predator for the first time.  His hands and beard rough from a week's worth of hard labor at the rice mill, yet gentle enough to take us for rides on his motorcycle when we asked.  He took us camping, whether we wanted to go or not and instilled in me a love and appreciation of good music.  He was the life of the party whatever the occasion.  He was fun and cool and lively.  Sure his brand of parenting was a little unorthodox and he's most likely be locked up now-in-days for taking me to R-rated action movies as a father-son bonding experience every month or for spending hours wrestling with me as I continued to come back for more until I was seriously injured, crying, and he was in trouble by way of mom.  We even got our first tattoos together.

I distinctly remember dad teaching me how to swim at the local Y by throwing me in the pool and forcing me to either swim or drown trying.  It was with the same sentiment that he left.  He died the day before my 24th birthday.  This forced me to spend a day that would normally be spent celebrating with friends and family diving into another aspect of the real world.  There came with it a sense that "nothing in this life is free and nothing worth having is easy".  He never said it but spoke in both of these instances saying "the world isn't going to cater to you or be given to you easily".  For that, I am thankful.

It would have been nice to have had more time with him, but some things aren't meant to be.  Hindsight is often 20/20.  It would have been nice to say what I didn't enough and do what we had always put off but when I think of those things I remember, and am thankful for, the things I was given.  Just the week before he passed away, during a time when we had not had an actual conversation in weeks if not months, we went to the feed store to get dog food.  As we pulled out of the store's parking lot my dad looked at me and said "I'm proud of you son".  I didn't respond, much to my regret, but instead quietly excepted his comment and carried on.  It was that little sentence that God used, in His perfect timing, to give me a lasting memory of the man I remember growing up with, the man that I remember as my dad.

...and man could he ever tell a story.


So, if you've got him, whether you're on great terms or not, enjoy him for being the man God has placed in your life.

peace.

my mama

If you want to see a picture of strength and determination compiled into a lifetime, look no further than Phyllis J Wofford.

Educator. Leader. Giver. Cancer Survivor. My mom.

Her parents are part of the greatest generation and raised her in rural Arkansas where work ethic and grit are part of your daily bread.  The middle child of three and only girl, she attended Barber College after high school to pursue a career in cutting hair.  She opened her own salon alongside a friend in Brinkley Arkansas.  It was there she lived with her husband Jimbo and their awesome first child (yours truly).

After transplanting to Jacksonville (AR) for a short while, we wound up in Jonesboro (AR) for my dad's job at Busch Agricultural Resources where he worked in the rice mill on the north side of town.  My mom used this opportunity to go back to school to become a teacher where she finished in under 4 years.

The work of raising two children and going to school full time didn't come easy, but boy did she ever make it look that way.  We grew up decently poor on the wrong end of town but never new anything less than extravagant Christmases and birthdays.  We didn't know until later in life that we had spent our childhood poor.  We were spoiled emotionally and in material things, but in the way you hope to spoil your children-not in the modern "over protect them and coddle them" sense.

My sister and I were raised to fear the Lord and the belt but were given every freedom to express ourselves and be creative in our own personalities and interests.  It was the perfect balance of a strict upbringing without making us "participation trophy winning" sissies on the freedom side.

Graduating early and getting a great teaching job pretty quick weren't good enough for her, so my mom moved on to become among the first class in Arkansas of teachers to receive the National Board for Professional Teachers certification in addition to her teaching job.  She has since made quite the name for herself by leading and instructing other teachers on how to obtain this certification.  She is the go-to woman on the issue and if you mention her name in those circles, you get a "THE Phyllis Wofford!?" response.  Yeah.  She's kind of a big deal.  A book on how to be the best teacher you can be will be out soon enough.

My mom continues to be the strong, caring, uber-supportive and giving woman she has always been, who never gets enough credit for her actions.  She opens up her home to strangers, leans on the Lord for wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, and is in a class all her own when it comes to upstanding women.  If you ever want to learn about how to manage life as a woman, parent, teacher, and all-around superhero, have a sit down with my mom.

I give you this TINY peek into who she is and where she's come from because today is her birthday.
I cherish her, appreciate her, and LOVE her more than any words on a blog could express.
Feel free to do the same to your mom.  She's not as cool as mine, but chances are, she's close and would love the time of day from you.

peace.

initial thoughts on bid laden's death

There are so many thoughts swirling around my head and heart right now as I soak in this historic news.

I consider myself to have a very healthy and appropriate level of patriotism and thus am very excited about this American victory.  I remember very distinctly being in my first period class in high school the morning of September 11th and watching the news unfold throughout the day.  Being 18 at the time, I remember the uncertainty of a looming war in conversations with my friends at the lunch table for weeks after, wondering if a draft would be calling upon us.
It is with that context that I celebrate with my fellow countrymen.  This is a great victory for those of us that watched the events unfold before our eyes-one I rejoice in for justice sake.

On the other hand, I am very torn.
I feel I cannot rejoice in the death of an individual that did not have a relationship with Jesus Christ.  While a great instrument of terror is now gone, another soul is forever separated from the presence of God's glory and grace.  This saddens me greatly.

I do not aim to be "holier than thou" on this matter and claim that I am not happy that we do not have to fear Bin Laden any longer.  Nor do I appreciate the sacrifice the men and women in our military have given any less.  Instead, I am in a solemn state where I look to God for guidance as to how to handle such immense things.  He is the author of creation, life, king and kingdoms.  In that, I take ultimate refuge.


On a history note:
This is BIG!

On a political note:
I'd like to remind you that it was not Bush, setting these events in motion, not Obama, giving the final order, that made this happen.  It was the brave, fighting men that carried out the operation-fighting on the front lines for years now-that made this possible.  Ultimate credit is due to them-not political constituents.  (Please keep in mind that politics is one of my least favorite subjects in this world-I do not associate with any major political party)


As the days and news around this progress, I will expound my thoughts and maybe write some more of them down.  Until then...USA!  USA!  USA!

-peace

life update

For those that I don't speak to too often, here is an update as to my situation with ministry in Miami.

Background:
I spent most of the Fall and early part of the Spring "negotiating" terms of me possibly coming back for an additional year in Miami.  It was a huge stress, to say the least, that included me flying to Jacksonville for an hour-long meeting with our state director, countless emails, phone calls, and budgeting of every aspect of the matter.
Finally, a couple months ago, I received word that the proposal, for me to stay with a pay increase, had been approved.  I was told that we'd work out details later.

Fast forward to last week.
I spoke with our human resource guy at the state office about the details.  He went over details about my situation with our state's executive director to get everything ironed out to best suit everyone involved.  The result of this meeting was me being brought on as a "administrative-approved employee", which means I'm just one step below a "board-elected employee".  This means I now get insurance, dental, and some life insurance paid for by the convention rather than out of my own pocket.  I also get vacation and sick days as well as get to stay living in the BCM building without having to pay rent.
The biggest news to come from all of this is the fact that I will not have to re-up each year through stressful "negotiations" and proposals.  Instead, I am a full employee on an "indefinite" timeline.  If I decide to leave, for whatever reason, I can or if they want to bring someone else in my place, they can but will give me plenty of advanced warning.

So, essentially, I'll be in Miami for several more years.  This is a huge relief of pressure to not have to wonder if I have a job each year.  It also gives me the opportunity to plan for some future vision within BCM, since I know I'll be here for a while.  I also continue to press forward with my seminary schooling.  I should be done in about a year and a half.  It has made me realize how much I enjoy learning about ministry and theology and hate our learning systems in America.  I press on though.

As I joked with a friend the other day, this lessens my chances of finding me a good southern girl, unless they come to me.  I guess that's something I'll just have to deal with.  I'm sure I'll manage.

-peace

...story of my life

For several years now I've had enough adventures, both in life and ministry, to warrant people constantly telling me I should write a book.  While I would love to do so, I'm not sure it would ever get published or read by anyone other than my mom.  Even with that being the case, I've jotted things down here and there should the time ever come for me to step up and make writing a book a reality.  For now, I plan on using this blog to at least write some of my ideas for what would be in my book.
___________________________


Often when something odd or slightly unpleasant happens, you'll hear someone say "story of my life".  I took that idea a bit further though, once I found myself saying that phrase more often than not because of all the oddity in my life.  With the idea of writing in the back of my mind, i thought "instead of 'story of my life' it'd be more like 'chapters in my book'", since i feel my life is too varied and adventured to fit all it has to offer within a title that falls short.  I couldn't have the title of the book about my life and ministry being something trivial like "a day late and a dollar short".

What's in a name?
It should be noted that from the initial idea to write a book, I had the title figured out.  Credit for that partially goes to Jason Mills.  While on a mission trip in NYC at the The Bowery, I was having a conversation with several of my students about the possibility of writing something and what it would look like.  With the types of stories I would include, and knowing somewhat my tendency to not be fully clothed all the time, Jason rattled off "Various Stages of Undressed: The Matt Wofford Story".  We all laughed at the idea and went on with our day.  This, however, got me thinking.  Maybe this did sum it all up.  Perhaps my life was a tale of various stages of being undressed.

As I recall from childhood, as evidence by a recent facebook photo album, I was never one to wear clothes too often, unless I absolutely found it to be necessity.  Even aging, and thus "maturing", didn't remedy the desire to forfeit clothing as my first option.  Despite my on-again, off-again "heftiness" in college I gladly took the reigns of the "Naked Guys", a group of BCM guys that would paint up their chests for home football games at Arkansas State.  To this day I think the phrase my sister has said to me more than any other is "Matt!....Pants!!" (of course eluding to the fact that I wasn't wearing any and thus needed to put some on to make her more comfortable)...Although I feel that if I were to wear pants around the house, when I'm home for Christmas and the occasional Summer weekend, it might throw her off and in fact be odd.

At any rate, beyond the fact that the title seemed to fit with my seemingly "free as a bird" lifestyle, it felt right in so many other ways.  The idea of "Various Stages of Undressed" felt like it reached deep into my soul.  I've always been a fan of the idea of the reverence and respect paid to royalty and who better to pay respect and reverence to than the King of kings?  Whether it is in my personal devotional time, study of scripture, or even corporate prayer, I always see myself bowing at the foot of the throne of God, on my knees, and completely humbled by His glory and might.  Going a step further, knowing that He knows my every thought and feeling, I realize there are no barriers between us.  For that reason, I am naked before God.  There is nothing that I can put up as a shield to cover up who I am, what I've done, or what I offer Him.  He sees me for what I am and still loves me as if I were the only one.  That amazes me and draws me closer to Him.  It is that moment that I feel closer to God than any other, knowing that there is nothing separating us, and that moment that I aim for in every aspect of my life...to be naked before God.
So, with that in mind, here is my life.  Journeying through various stages of undressed.

-peace

And we're back!

I guess I decided to take 2010 off from blogging.  It was a crappy year anyway (save 4-5 things within it).
At any rate, for those 3 of you that happen to stumble upon this while wasting time avoiding other life responsibilities, you'll notice that I've updated the look and feel of the blog.
You will, without a doubt, also notice that I've updated the title.  My next post will give details as to the story behind that.  You'll just have to stay tuned until next time.

Until then...